so i weighed myself first thing this morning --- and discovered that i lost 3kg in one week.
there's nothing like losing weight fast to rekindle my resolve!
newfound resolve
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Posted by Patricia at 2:28 PM 4 comments
Labels: health, slimming, south beach diet, weight loss
help!!!!
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
this is getting to be too tough. i want to quit!
it's hard for me because i have to prepare separate meals for myself, and for my family. and i'm always hungry! so i'm always preparing food that don't really satisfy me at all. i know it's the sugar craving that's making this stage really tough. even the 1 kg that i lost doesn't seem to be worth it.
aaaargh! i should be stronger than this!
Posted by Patricia at 9:06 PM 1 comments
Labels: aaargh
what i learned from bob greene
before i started on the south beach diet, i went through other diet plans, and tried them out for a few weeks. dr. perricone's diet was way too expensive, what with all the supplements he recommended. so i just took a few pointers from him (choosing colorful vegetables only, and taking lots of salmon oil) and moved on to others. bob greene's total body makeover was one of the most sensible i've ever encountered.
he recommends 4 cornerstones that you need to have before you start on the program: honesty, responsibility, commitment, and inner strength. this was his deal -- take however long you need to be honest with yourself, assume responsibility for your actions, make a commitment to change your life, and use your inner strength to help you stick to your resolve. then, you move on to the 12-week body makeover program. as you can probably imagine, the honesty part was the hardest for me. i've been deluding myself about my weight for the longest time, and finally facing the awful truth was very uncomfortable, to say the least. but i did it.
his diet plan wasn't all that hard, actually. once you get past the cornerstones, it's pretty easy to stick to the program. he has 5 simple eating rules:
- have an eating cut off time. preferably 3 hours before bedtime.
- eat a nourishing breakfast. it stops you from overeating the rest of the day. it also revs up your metabolism.
- drink a minimum of 6 8-ounce glasses of water everyday.
- eliminate alcohol.
- make eating a conscious act. when you do something consciously, you know what you're doing and why.
so now i'm on the south beach diet because i want to eliminate my craving for starchy sugary food. and i want to jump start my weight loss. if i see results right away, i am more likely to stick to a program. i'm also increasing my exercise load. let's see where this goes.
Posted by Patricia at 11:49 AM 0 comments
Labels: bob greene, dr. perricone, exercise, south beach diet, weight watchers
day 1
Monday, August 25, 2008
so i officially started on the south beach diet today. and it's really tough. i was able to get hold of a copy of the south beach diet supercharged from the library, so at least i didn't have to pay for a program.
i like the fact that the book contains a lot of recipes, so that i can still fulfill my love of cooking good food. and i like that fact that, unlike the atkins diet, it allows me to eat beans, which are really filling and high fibre, and drink unsweetened low-fat soymilk. i'm such a baby, i love my milk! i'm so happy dr. agastson recognized that calcium in dairy is actually important in weight loss. when i was on the atkins diet, the hardest part for me was turning my back on my favorite beverage of all time. at least now i don't feel so deprived.
i had a really good and healthy breakfast today. i roasted portobello mushrooms topped with slices of tomatoes and some basil pesto. then i layered some scrambled eggs and chopped chives on top. that was really yummy! but an hour and a half later and i was really craving for my usual starchy breakfast. i didn't give in though.
for mid morning snack i had 15 cashew nuts, and another roasted portobello mushroom with grated cheese and garlic on top. for lunch, i had vegetable quiche (no crust of course.) i will post my favorite south beach diet recipes in my multiply site later.
so far so good. but then again, it's just my first day. i'm keeping my fingers crossed.
Posted by Patricia at 2:46 PM 2 comments
Labels: south beach diet
i think i know my problem...
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
i have reverse anorexia. anorexics typically see themselves as fatter than they actually are. in my case, even though i am seriously obese, the image that i have of myself in my head is that of a normal person. yes, even when i look in the mirror. i'm fat, and i know i'm fat. but if you ask me to draw a picture of myself, i would draw a thin person. well not super thin like kate moss, but me in my ideal weight.
this image gets shaken whenever i see a photo of myself. that's why photoshop is my best friend.
this erroneous self-image is partly what prevented me from acknowledging my weight problem. even as the pounds kept piling on, my self-image remained skinny and allowed me to live comfortably in denial of the problem creeping up all around me.
the dsm (diagnostic and statistical manual for mental disorders) doesn't have a category for cases like mine. the closest thing would be body dysmorphic disorder, and that's what people who've had 100+ plastic surgeries have. did you see that girl who wants to look like barbie? yep, she has bdd.
but maybe i do have it in some degree. otherwise i wouldn't see myself as a sultry siren when in fact i'm closer to a whale.
Posted by Patricia at 4:10 PM 5 comments
Labels: health, neuroses, self-image, slimming, weight loss
trying out the south beach diet
one of my more successful attempts at losing weight was when i did the atkins diet while working out at the gym for 3 hours a day. i had just gotten out of a really horrible marriage and i was desperate to lose all the weight i had gained when i was depressed. a complete revamp was in order, and i had all the determination i needed to succeed.
and succeed i did.
my determination is not as great now, i'm very happy with who i am and what i do. i'm in a fabulous relationship with a good man who loves me and tries his best to make me happy. but i still want to lose weight because i know i have to.
so i'm going to try the south beach diet. i've heard of countless people who have lost weight on it. i will start on this next week, because i still have enough grocery items to last me a week. but i resolve to have only salads in the evening.
this is the first phase (grabbed from their website):
Phase 1, the shortest Phase, lasts for just two weeks and is designed to eliminate cravings for sugar and refined starches - and to jump-start your weight loss. The purpose of Phase 1 is to stabilize blood sugar (which minimizes cravings), making it ideal for people who are prediabetic or diabetic, as well as for those who need to lose a lot of weight.
The focus of this two-week period is on eating plenty of nutrient-dense, fiber-rich (and guaranteed delicious!) foods that satisfy your appetite. Your meals include lean protein, such as fish and other seafood; skinless white-meat poultry, and lean cuts of beef (vegetarians can enjoy meat substitutes, tofu, and beans); high-fiber veggies; reduced-fat cheeses; eggs; low-fat dairy; and healthy, unsaturated fats, such as those found in avocados, nuts and seeds, and extra-virgin olive and canola oils.
During Phase 1, you'll fill up on dishes like Chicken Breasts Stuffed With Spinach and Goat Cheese, Seared Pecan Salmon With Lentils, Garlic and Soy Grilled Pork Chops, and more.
The South Beach Diet encourages snacking, so you'll also get to choose two tasty snacks each day, like Spicy Nut Mix, reduced-fat cheese, and veggies with our zesty Peanut Dip. Plus, you'll dine on delicious desserts (every day!), including Chilled Espresso Custard, Heavenly Lemon Mousse, and our famed Ricotta Crème. With all the options - from gourmet meals to on-the-go snacks to quick weeknight dinners - you won't feel hungry or deprived!
Posted by Patricia at 2:24 PM 0 comments
Labels: south beach diet
quotes for the day
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
from, of all the weirdest sources, mary kate olsen!
Posted by Patricia at 9:24 PM 0 comments
Labels: inspiration
reality bites
i've been avoiding the weighing scale for i don't know how long. i suck at facing the truth. every time i manage to enrol in a gym and some fitness consultant tries to get my current weight, i mutter protestations just so i won't see exactly how terrible the situation is. as if by not seeing the numbers, i can change the facts. as if by not knowing, i can deny the truth.
today i tried on a dress that i wore early last year. i looked pretty in that dress, i loved the fit, the style, and i loved the memories that came with my wearing it.
i couldn't close the zipper.
waves of shame washed over me as i realized how much i really have gained. and this time, my bed rest of 4 years ago cannot be used as an excuse. sure i did gain a lot of weight (20kg) when i was pregnant. but i have gained some more in the past 2 years.
i will weigh myself today, and heaven help me if that needle doesn't move back 10 lbs every month.
Posted by Patricia at 3:28 PM 2 comments
Labels: weight gain, weight loss
the first week
Sunday, August 10, 2008
my first week didn't go very well. i walked a few miles everyday ( i try to reach 10,000 steps, but i was successful only 3 times), but that's about the only exercise i was able to do. my diet is a little better though. i'm taking it slowly so that i don't feel too deprived right away and therefore set myself up for failure. i don't skip meals, but i try to eat more vegetables. twice this week, i had salad for dinner (vinaigrette dressing) instead of my usual rice and meat. plus, i avoided snacking on sweets the whole week (well, except for one time when i ate one piece of godiva truffle).
next week, i plan to substitute salads for more of the meals (maybe 5 times that week, if i can bring myself to believe that a salad will ever be as tasty as pasta); and walk more miles.
Posted by Patricia at 4:09 PM 0 comments
the ballooning of me
Monday, August 4, 2008
Posted by Patricia at 7:35 PM 3 comments
Labels: before and after, health, weight gain
a shortage of will-power
Saturday, August 2, 2008
all my life, i've always admired women who were strong, decisive, elegant, talented, and accomplished. women like jacqueline kennedy, diana vreeland, clare boothe luce. while i definitely have jackie's penchant for pearls, i sadly lack her discipline and will power. she watched her weight almost obsessively, weighing herself every day. she jumped on her trampoline to maintain her figure, and cut down on her intake whenever she gained even a pound.
you may ask me, why not just be happy with the weight i'm in?
the answer is simple and superficial --- i love clothes! i love fashion! i like stepping out in stylish ensembles looking like a poster girl for mommy chic. and i can't do that if i'm obese!
forget about health risks. of course i'm aware of them, but they're not my primary motivation. i want to wear spaghetti straps, white cigarette pants with gauzy tunics, sheath dresses... i want to look good in long gowns as well as in jeans...i want to be able to wear whatever i want and not worry how the cellulite in my arms are displayed or how an outfit makes my huge belly more prominent.
i want to stop hiding in tent dresses and empire waists!
Posted by Patricia at 6:49 PM 7 comments
Labels: motivation
help me
only tough love works on me. it's not like i've never had to shed pounds before, because i have, and i did. but circumstances were different then.
oh no, i made another excuse. scratch that.
if i did it before, i can do it again. aaaaargh! it's so easy to say but i'm no match for a bowl of pasta with truffle oil and reduced white wine sauce.
please help me. anyone?
Posted by Patricia at 5:33 PM 6 comments
reinventing myself
here i am in my second home in cyberspace, posting my thoughts for all to read. the very thought sends shivers down my spine.
but i need to do this. i need a separate home for what i have to chronicle.
i am reinventing myself once again.
for years i have struggled with my excess weight and i don't like it. sure i can make up excuses to silence any complaints or comments from the people around me. but i am here because i'm saying that it will all stop. now. no more excuses.
i want to be ready to re-enter the work force in a few months, and to do that i need to shed at least some of these excess pounds. no employer will consider me seriously if i look like a slob, no matter how well put together my outfit will be or how fantastic my cv is. when i go to interviews with my butt spilling over the sides of the chair, i'm not going to get any respect.
so there. this is my journey to take charge of myself.
step one: lose 50 lbs. by december 2008.
do i even need to talk about the other steps? well, maybe i do. but that's for another blog.
Posted by Patricia at 5:06 PM 8 comments